Comments on: School Bullies and Suicide of Victims

By: admin

admin — Sat, 03 Apr 2010 13:24:37 +0000

ausetkmt,
Obviously you took the reins and stopped that girl from bullying you. Thank goodness that put an end to it for you. Imagine the shy, retiring kids who don’t have your oomph. They cannot stand up to people and the adults who should, don’t. And these days, the kids are bullying on social networks. Unless they are raised with character instilled in them and proper values, how can this train be stopped?

By: ausetkmt

ausetkmt — Sat, 03 Apr 2010 13:13:48 +0000

Excellent Post Cher, and very timely too.

Criminality amongst children seems to be at an all time high; especially in matters concerning school. bullying has a devastating effect on everyone who is caught up. the adults have the supreme responsibility to step in when they see it; even when it appears harmless. harm is always caused when kids have another group against them, even if it’s labeled “harmless kidstuff”. there is no such thing. it’s recently come to clarity, but if we look back, it was there all the time. we all saw it, and all had to deal with it in our own way at our own time.

I stepped up and had a physical fight when I really didn’t want to. I was told that if I didn’t do it, that I’d be pushed around forever – so I beat the bejesus out of the girl, who had the nerve to follow me to my house. when we arrived there and my mom saw the crowd of kids and the girl calling me names, I told my mom what happened. She opened the porch door and said if she hit you – then you are right to defend yourself. this was 1970. that was all it took; My Mom’s Okay to Go To War.

I beat that girl till I’m sure my panties were wet. sorry but some of us have the excitement issue. violence can change a childs mind in many ways. after I beat the girl badly while the neighbors and the crowd watched, along with my mom on our front porch; My mom got a washcloth for the girl to wash up.

Then Mom made me give her one of my tops, since I tore hers off literally. Then after calling the girls house, my mom walked both of us to the girls home, and knocked on the door and told her mom what happened. her mom thanked my mom.

Her mom also asked me if I was hurt. aside from a few scratches that her daughter managed to sneak in – I was basically boo boo free. that proved to her mom that her daughter was a whole lotta mouth and would probably be a problem in the future. the girl was also made to apologize to both my mom and to me right then on the spot. and yes some of the kids in the crowd followed us to the girls home to see the conclusion. woww.

can you imagine that happening today ? probably not but if it did I can be sure it would dissolve alot of these childhood violence issues. My Granddaughter takes karate now, and I took boxing classes as an adult; so we don’t have any problems with people thinking we won’t defend ourselves. usually people look at us as protectors since we are self assured in our demeanor, always.

No guy can’t gas We Up; is our family motto on violence.

By: admin

admin — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 18:17:35 +0000

Tina T,
You are such a wise woman and I am quite certain a wonderful mother. Children do not learn the consequences of their actions without parental guidance. Being a parent must be kindred to driving these days. You know that you are a good driver. It’s the others on the road you have to watch out for.

By: admin

admin — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 18:14:56 +0000

Chris J,
” a coarsening of our culture.” How very apt. One needs only to look at the militias sprouting up; the taunts of racial implications during the presidential election; and those arguing that we should not provide any means of health care to “lazy takers” of the system. All of this trickles into the core of families and the children who become weeds rather than flowers. In some way I suppose we are all to blame, but I lay the burden of what happens to children who are bullied directly at the feet of their parents.

By: Tina T

Tina T — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 17:39:36 +0000

This case is heart breaking. As the mom of a teen boy and soon to be teen, it really hits home. As much as the school obviously needed to do more, especially since some of the “bullying” fell under making threats which is a crime, I do think that it starts with the parents. I heard a brief interview with the mother of one of the girl bullies who at some point had been suspended for her actions. The mom definitely had the attitude that her daughter had served her time in suspension, and she really sounded offended that the bullies were being blamed for this suicide. I couldn’t help but think “and therein lies the problem, because how could a mother describe the situation so coldly when another mother’s daughter is dead (her attitude made me sick.)

I was also shocked to hear that these kids posted horrible things to her memorial page because what parent on earth would allow their kid internet privileges after they took part in something so disgraceful. Now the courts will have to dole out the punishments since these teens obviously did not have any consequences to their behavior from their own parents. Kids don’t bully at this level unless they have gotten away for years and years.

Very sad, and it makes my heart ache, and of course makes me fear for my own children.

By: Chris J

Chris J — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 16:07:00 +0000

I agree with Bluzdude, but think it’s not just children who act like hyenas – divide and conquer (with or without violence) is a tried and true strategy of people generally.

And we do have a coarsening of culture; again as Bluzdude points out, there is very little civil debate – only shouting and bullying in the institutions that should be examples to everyone.

By: admin

admin — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 08:46:46 +0000

Dorothy S,
I believe your concern is justified. Parents need to be tuned into their children and watch for warning signs of bullying. Zero tolerance is the only acceptable way of addressing this.

By: admin

admin — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 08:44:11 +0000

VH,
I agree that teachers, staff and school administrators need to be held accountable. If investigations are thorough and find that some were aware but did nothing to stop these actions, they are complicit by neglect in the dire consequences.

By: Dorothy Stahlnecker

Dorothy Stahlnecker — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 07:52:47 +0000

When I read and heard about this I was sick my seven year old grandson Noah, has Tourettes syndrome, gratefully to date it’s a mild case however, he does put up with teasing because of his twitching. I’m glad finally, there will be action taken against anyone who bullies or humiliates our children in school, there should be zero tolerance for any kind teasing or harassment to students as school should be a safe place for our kids to go.

This was a wonderful post.

Dorothy from grammology
grammology.com

By: VH

VH — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 05:36:32 +0000

When are they going to haul some of the teachers, staff, and administrators to court? Ridiculous. These people are supposed to take care of these kids.

By: admin

admin — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 21:28:43 +0000

bluzdude,
Your insights are so good. I had not thought about primal instincts and the herd mentality, but it truly is an interesting concept. At this moment, I would like to rid every home that has children in it from those violent video games. Who knows? Maybe there is subliminal messaging within those that allows ‘kids’ to think these attacks are viable resolutions to problems.

By: bluzdude

bluzdude — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 20:56:57 +0000

My heart goes out to that poor girl and her family. I hope they throw the freakin’ book at those animals that hounded her to death.

Part of me thinks that all this bullying is the inevitable result of the general coursening of our culture. Kids see obnoxiousness and personal attacks everywhere on TV from Jersey Shore to Meet the Press, to your local tea party.

But then the other part of me knows that this kind of activity has been around long before this recent swan-dive of civility. The big difference is that it was harder to bully you back then when you weren’t face to face.

Maybe it’s something in our animal past that is not yet buried over when it comes to kids. Look at the strategy… separating a smaller or weaker one from the rest of the herd, then subjecting it to a series of cuts and slashes and just running it until it gives up. Is that not just like a pack of hyenas in the wild?

I read that the school was well aware of the situation. How is it that there was no action taken? The parents of each one of those monsters should have been dragged into school and made to explain the behavior of their demon spawn.

Thanks for giving this issue some space. As you can probably guess, this one strikes a nerve.